A wellness experiment

For the past year and a half I’ve conducted an experiment that has required quite a bit of courage on my part (especially in the beginning.)  I’ve been recording short videos on Saturdays and sharing them on social media. They’re a way for me to be able to connect and share insights about wellness and about life. The project started as an exercise to help me get out of my comfort zone and then I found that I enjoyed recording and posting the videos. I will be sharing some of them here with you from now on.

Social media says my peers are really rocking their lives

The subject of today’s video? The grass often seems greener. You’ve heard this stated as “the grass is always greener on the other side.” And it has to do with the fact that we often think and even believe that everyone else is having more fun than we are, or that other people have it easier, or that other people’s lives are better. That is simply a matter of perspective. And it may actually have a lot to do with social media and with the culture we live in: the glossy magazines, the perfection of HGTV homes, and the selective sharing of the best looking Selfies. We live in a culture of immediate gratification; not patience. In a culture of fast-paced everything; not one of slowing things down. And that pace does carry over to our relationships and our commitments. It can make us impatient, quick to anger and it can stand in the way of our seeing the truth of our situations and relationships.

What’s wrong with just taking a pill to feel better?

Instant gratification says that if you are in pain, you want a pill to make it go away. If the job is not perfect, you want to find a new one. If the relationship requires work, you want to leave it for someone else. We are tempted and even urged to leave instead of giving it our best; to take off running instead of doing the work to help make it better. However, the work needed to make it better is where the true personal growth and true treasures are found. Processes, growth, cycles are the rhythm of Nature, of healing and of longevity. The best things in life do take time.

Isn’t it sometimes healthier to run rather than to stay and face the truth?

We have all done this at some point or another. We’ve all said things like, “I’m going to go on vacation and that will make things better.” Or, “I’m going to stop seeing that person and I will feel better then.” Or, “I’m starting a new job and then I will be able to afford that.” All of these are indications of wanting to escape or avoid rather than being willing to listen to what these situations are wanting to teach us. When we are unhappy, we are experiencing dissonance. But that dissonance is not your enemy; in fact it is your friend. It gives you precious data about what you want and need … and what you don’t. Now, I want to be sure you understand I am not saying that you should stay in a job, in a situation or relationship where you are ill, where you are disrespected or where you feel unsafe. However, if you feel uncomfortable, agitated and you’d just rather walk away because you simply don’t like it … then the situation can be a great opportunity for personal exploration.

I am suggesting that rather than believing that the grass is greener elsewhere, you look instead at the dissonance the situation is presenting for you, realize that the dissonance is perhaps telling you that something very precious to you is missing, learn what that is … and then leave if you want to or need to but from a position of strength after having learned something valuable for you. You don’t leave stressed out or burned out, or in a big huff but rather on your terms, knowing you gave it your best. And yes, you may be thinking this is easier said than done. You are right. But I practice Plant Spirit Medicine healing and I am about wellness and I write and blog and do ritual and pray … and get out of my comfort zone because these are powerful acts and about building a better world; not because they are easy or popular things to do. So no, it isn’t easy. But as a dear friend once taught me: the path of heart is not for sissies. 🙂